As I sit outside the practice room listening to the lesson going on inside, I wonder what others will think when it's my turn, when I am the nameless, faceless voice on the other side of the door.
She sounds like an angel as she aahhhhs and alleluhas her way to the heavens, a true operatic professional. When I first came here about 10 months ago, I was terribly dismayed by the lack of sound proofing in this place. You can hear everything! I thought. What if someone hears me and hates it? The realization that I wouldn't have to see their faces out here in this hallway as I belted and cracked inside was a little comfort at least. But then again why am I even here? Certainly not to become some amazing singer who'd one day undoubtedly have a top selling album. I am here to fight my demons. Moments from now, I will enter that room to battle fear of judgment, I will battle the fear of failure and I will battle myself, my own cruelest judge and worst enemy. I come here to get stronger. I come here to remind myself that life is too short to get bogged down by being worried or scared that someone will realize or assume I'm flawed, or not good enough. The truth is, I am flawed, and at many things, I am not good enough. But that is no reason not to try and certainly no reason not to be happy doing things that bring me joy, like singing.
