Thursday, December 14, 2006

ouch

My head is stuffed to the brim with thoughts and impressions and it seems that I keep finding myself in this position.....with minutes left to go at the public library before it closes and no actual concrete job searching having happened, just checked emails and thoughts swirling and whirling......
Maybe I can number them:

1. I need a nice job that pays me enough money to pay my bills and my loans and afford internet at home so I no longer have to lug this bug around with me all day...consequently, if I had a job with that kind of money, I would not need to the internet so desperately anyway. Catch 22 that is what that is......

2. It is semiironic that I felt it necessary to use the term 'my brain hurts' because of all the things in it, because my brothers fiance's brain DOES hurt. I just found out about two hours ago that she was hospitalized for blackouts and nausea three days ago and they do not know what is wrong with her. Hopefully nothing so drastic as tumor or cancer but we still do not know, and her insurance lasped and there is the new baby to worry about.....shed exactly two tears so far but like I said, hopefully NOTHING is wrong....

3. Just got an email from a new acquaintance tearing up my resume. Why is it that people who are seemingly knowledgeable and qualified all say COMPLETELY different things about how to do a resume? I am at a loss as to who I should listen too....

4. I have had a few phone interviews with some interesting companies so I pray that I will have 'the job' before long. I have a face-to-face interview on Monday and am wondering if my business suit still fits and if my hair is going to continue to be unruly in the face of my determination to look professional. Down, hair, down! I half think I should borrow money and head to the salon for a wash and blow dry...straight hair just stays down easier..

5. My dreams remain ever so vivid and two (maybe three) nights in a row I have dreamt about the same person. So much so that in these waking moments it is so hard to believe that this person is not in my life AT ALL and I have been feeling a bit like I was dumped. Damn. I even wrote a nice poem about it. I am a 29 year old lovesick teenager all over again. Guys, you know, I could do without all that drama!

6. Children's classes have been such a HUGE blessing this time of year with the job problems and all, I can't tell you how nice it is to go and spend a few hours with such freely loving individuals. That being said, I am still not quite ready to have a couple of my own yet, which is good, cuz....you know, I'm single....and essentially jobless.....and stuff.

7. Speaking of jobless, I have been temping-right now I work in a building just across the street from the Sears Tower and I have been feeling a bit like a fish out of water. Which has only served to emphasize HOW BAD it was at my old job. I keep looking over my shoulder waiting for 'the boss' to sneak up and make sure I am not surfing myspace, or perking my ears for the excessive and bitter backbiting but IT IS NOT HAPPENING.....people just do their jobs here. and they trust me and they say hello and that's it. It is SOOOOOO nice. I am quite paranoid, you see, I got used to the suspicion and disrespect and tiptoe walking of my last job, thought it was quite normal...I guess. I am so glad I am temping to get me out of that old shell before I step into any new career role.

8. I am very hungry.

9. the library closes in 10 minutes.

10. I just figured there should be a number ten. I have more things to ponder of course, like how I need to worko on not becoming complacent in the job search. how to passionately and aggressively pursue the life that I want for myself. How to budget and save. all that good stuff. Things don't just happen but I keep hoping they will.....I want to say I cant believe I am 29 but I want to say that because I am already feeling like where did the time go? no regrets like I forgot I wanted to save the world....but I think it's important to always have purpose and perspective......and I lost a few years of that...oh see I am waxing all philisophical and the library police are ready for me to get my ass on out the the door......ok BYE

4 comments:

Ingrid said...

oh, les. we need to get together. we're both like the valleys of search and knowledge. btw, thanks for the info on the agency. i feel you on about 9 out of 10 of ur items.

my head hurts too (literally)

so i'm gonna let miles davis' "so what" on iTune soothe my aches away.

so for 10 minutes, the outside world and all the crap thats going on--does not exist.

peace and love, sista.

Sholeh said...

Oy...good luck on the job search. As for resumes: everyone has their own ideas about how a resume should looks, so it can be incredibly frustrating when you have different people critique it. I would say that as long as it is simple, direct, has good spelling and grammar you'll be fine. Don't over-think it, and don't let other people freak you out. :-)

Anonymous said...

Agreed. The resume thing happened to me all the time and it was so frustrating. But the fact is that you can't just have ONE resume if you are applying for more than one kind of job. I would just alter it and emphasize different things, depending on what kind of job I wanted. Good luck at your interview!!!!!!

ElleG77 said...

Thanks ladies! I think I will have to keep a few different versions of the res around, but ultimately, simple and to the point is the way I will choose to go....