Lately

Lately I seem to keep finding these jobs that are, without a doubt, perfect for me.
Almost as if they had my very own name written in the job title. And though this has happened to me before, in the past, and not culminated in anything notable, each time the rush is the same. The excitement is the same. The thoughts are the same.

I start to think, "There is no way I am not getting this job! They will see my resume and cover letter and want to call me immediately!" I begin to imagine myself in the role. I usually jump around a little bit because the excitement of finding myself out there, in print, reflected in the description of something that never before existed in my imagination, is sometimes too much to contain in my seated form.

I usually pace around a few times and start to imagine the new cover letter I have to write, what tone should I take? How flippant can I be? How super qualified am I?

And then after some time passes, I get it done. I send it off. And then I wait. And wait. And wait.

And in the past, sometimes, a call is made. A conversation is had. Sometimes a letter is received. But nothing has yet panned out. But do not mistake my writing tone. Disappointment is brief but flutters by faster than helicopter seeds on a windy day. Discouragement does not exist. The fact alone that I keep finding these things with increasing occurences is a sign. But the thing I note, while sitting here breathing fast and unable to sit still, is this, in and of itself, is life being lived.

That whole phrase, "Happiness is a journey, not a destination," comes to mind in moments like these.

And I know that I am happy because this is my journey and it's making me smile and wriggle and jump.